There are three main reasons to watch CBS's "Amazing Race."
1. To see a great show that takes us to places we'll probably never get to visit.
2. To root for teams we like.
3. To root against teams we hate.
In the past few weeks, No. 3 has become No. 1 for me. Every time I see Charla Baklayan Faddoul and Mirna Hindoyan onscreen, I just want to scream.
I so want them eliminated.
I haven't been this annoyed with any "Amazing" racers since the ill-fated family edition and the remarkably clueless Weaver family.
I couldn't stand Charla and Mirna when they appeared in Season 5 of "The Amazing Race"; I like them even less in the "All-Stars" edition.
They were inexplicably popular in Season 5. Apparently, some viewers bought the weekly sob story about how Charla was out to prove that her small stature wouldn't be an impediment.
But every week, after declaring, "I want to prove that little people can do it," Charla would implore locals in the various countries, "I'm little — help me."
Gag.
When host Phil Keoghan welled up with tears when they were eliminated, I wanted to smack him.
This time, it's worse. It's easy to dislike Charla and Mirna for screaming at each other and their persecution complex, which leads them to believe they're forever being jobbed by the other teams even when they're not.
That leads to a series of nasty conflicts with other teams. They're so self-absorbed they complain about other teams "stealing" cabs from them when they're the ones attempting the theft.
They've rudely cut in line at airline ticket counters and then accused others of being rude to them.
The first time they were on the show, Charla uttered curses and spit on the ground in front of another team in a dispute over a cab. (And she and Mirna were in the wrong then, too.)
But what makes Charla and Mirna insufferable is they're ugly Americans. They're rude and condescending to the people whose countries they're visiting.
They don't speak the language, yet when they talk to the natives they affect phony accents and broken English, as if that will make them more easily understood. It's not just idiotic, it's insulting to the intelligence of everyone they encounter.
And they treat the natives like they're idiots. In Sunday's episode, Mirna felt the need to instruct their driver not to run over people.
The look on his face made it clear how he felt about Mirna. The same way I do.
Having listed the reasons I can't stand Charla and Mirna, the fact that I (along with various friends and family members) feel so strongly about them is actually a compliment to "The Amazing Race." That we get so involved in the race is an indication of just how good the show is.
Although if Charla and Mirna win, I am going to scream. Loudly.
A two-hour edition of "Amazing Race: All-Stars" airs Sunday at 7 p.m. on CBS/Ch. 2.
E-MAIL: pierce@desnews.com