Dear Angela,
I got married and divorced very young. I bore my testimony about this painful experience in church because, miraculously, I'm getting through it. I felt like sharing my story might offer hope to another person. I didn't think about the fact that maybe people would be less inclined to date me knowing that I've been through a divorce. So far. I've not been asked out in my ward. It could be a coincidence, but I'm worried that I've ruined my reputation with the men before any of them got the chance to know me. Do you think this could be true? And if so, how could I fix it?
— Dating Again
Dear Dating Again,
Honestly, I'm sure some man in the congregation crossed you off of his "potential spouse" list, after he heard your story. But, this is the risk we take whenever we reveal any portion of ourselves to other people. They can reject us, they can decide we aren't good enough, they can hurt us.
Lucky for you, you don't need to worry about those people. There is no "fixing" of your reputation to do. You were moved to share a story about how the gospel has blessed your life, even during trial. What a beautiful thing! Continue to do things when moved by the Spirit of God. Share your heart with your ward family and allow them to see and know you.
I would also add that even though you're healing from your divorce, it's natural to be somewhat insecure about what other people might think. The adversary knows this and will look for opportunities to have you think, "I'm being treated this way because I'm divorced." Just be aware of that and strive to push those thoughts out whenever they arrive.
Love,
Angela
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Angela Trusty gives advice about religion and relationships. Submit a topic to askangela.dn@gmail.com