He’s a senior for us; he was voted to our leadership council, and he’s just been around the block, gone through a lot of adversity in his life, and he’s really brought that group together. – Utah running backs coach Kiel McDonald

SALT LAKE CITY — Even in the most painful, miserable moments, Jordan Howard doesn’t have to grasp at gratitude.

The physical reminder of just how lucky he is happens to be right there under his helmet in the form of a bullet hole next to his left eye.

“There are some days I’m like, ‘Oh, whatever’,” the 23-year-old said of what it’s like to live every day knowing his life could have easily ended at 16. “And then, there are some days when I’m just looking in the mirror, and I just, well, I feel the bullet hole…And I’m like, this is God. I believe with all my heart that he has something, he has me here for a reason.”

AN UNLIKELY LEADER

When you ask who the leader of the running backs is, both coaches and players point to Howard.

Howard joined the Utah program as a walk-on via Riverside (California) City College, but on Monday the team announced it had awarded him a scholarship. Howard played in only four games last season, with his first appearance as a running back coming against Arizona when he carried the ball five times for 32 yards.

But it isn’t the senior's athletic ability that has earned him the respect of both his teammates and his coaches.

“He’s really like the guy in the room,” said sophomore Zack Moss, who also happens to be Howard’s roommate. “We all kind of follow his lead. ... We all respect him, we really do. He’s a really hard worker; he has a lot of passion for this game.”

Running backs coach Kiel McDonald doesn’t hesitate when asked who leads the position group.

“He’s a great young man,” McDonald said. “He’s a senior for us; he was voted to our leadership council, and he’s just been around the block, gone through a lot of adversity in his life, and he’s really brought that group together. So if there’s going to be any leader named in that group it’s going to be Jordan Howard.”

Howard's leadership was evident at a recent practice when the running backs were struggling through gassers in the mid-day heat at Rice-Eccles. He was the first one across the line, and he turned to immediately encourage his teammates to dig a little deeper, push a little harder.

The economics major, who hopes to someday work in real estate or insurance, is shocked when he's told his teammates and coaches labeled him the group’s leader.

“Actually, it does surprise me a lot,” he said. “I don’t know, just that the coaches think that highly of me. That really is surprising to me.” Part of his shock comes from the fact that he never set out to be a team leader.

“It’s just me,” he said of why he does what he does on and off the field. “I want to be great.”

Some of the reasons Howard embraces every aspect of his opportunities to play football at Utah are rooted in a tragic night in January 2011. Then 16 years old, the Redlands, California, native and four of his friends were walking to a movie when a man stepped from a car and shot at them.

FAITH AND MIRACLES

“At first I had no clue that I was shot,” said Howard describing how the teens ran as the shots rang out. “I finally looked down and I saw all the blood on my shirt. I initially thought I got shot in the stomach, and it’s crazy how the mind works. I saw blood on my stomach, and I started to feel pain in my stomach, for whatever reason.”

He said he saw a bullet hit one friend in the jaw, before he and another friend ran down an alley. As he ran, he realized something was wrong with his left eye.

“I felt like a gnat got in my eye,” he said. “You know, my vision started to go away instantly; it started to get blurry.”

Howard said he realized he needed to get to a hospital and flagged down a passing motorist.

“I stopped a car, and love from God,” he said. “It was a nurse getting off of work.”

She called an ambulance.

One of his friends, Andrew Jackson, died at the scene, while another, Quinn McCaleb died at the hospital. Tequan Roberson (who was referred to as Tequan Thomas in some news accounts) and Howard were seriously wounded, while the fifth boy escaped without injury.

“Doctors were telling me, ‘We’re probably going to have to take your left eye’,” he said. “They said the blindness would travel to my other eye, and I would eventually go completely blind. But my mom was there, just letting them know that there’s a God and all things are possible through him.”

Gail Howard refused to let doctors remove her son’s damaged eye.

“I am thankful for my mom, and to God, because they didn’t take my eye, and now I have 20/20 vision,” he said. “Actually it was better than 20/20 last time I went to the doctors. My vision is better than ever.”

A smile spreads across Howard’s face as he talks about his mother and her commitment to her faith.

“My mom, she was never somebody who forced church on us, but she made sure we knew growing up that there is a God and that Jesus Christ is our savior,” he said. “She believed if she forced us, we’d go away from church. So, it worked out for her because I go to (United Pentecostal) church every Sunday without her telling me to go.”

Howard was a freshman at Riverside City College when the man who shot him, and two accomplices, were sentenced to multiple life sentences for the murder of McCaleb and Jackson, as well as the attempted murder of Roberson, Howard and Antonio Puente.

A MAN ON A MISSION

The scar near Howard’s eye is a visible reminder to him that he doesn’t really need.

That night and the miracles that followed have shaped Howard in many ways, especially in what he views as a challenge and what he sees as an opportunity.

A few years after that initial shooting, Roberson passed way.

“He was one of the best football players I knew,” he said. “He’s the reason why I wear number 26.”

When his motivation wanes, he only has to think about how his childhood friend and high school teammate was robbed of these moments. Howard doesn’t just think of his friend when he gets the chance to play the game he loves; he savors it all, even the stuff other guys dread.

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From offseason weight workouts to gassers on heat-radiating turf, every single second is a blessing.

“I try to remember how he used to play,” he said touching the number on his practice jersey. “I try to, as much as I can, ask myself, ‘What would Quanie do in a situation like this?’ Because growing up, he was the guy I admired.”

Roberson played with the effort, energy and passion that Howard now tries embodies every time he laces up his cleats.

“He had that chip on his shoulder, and he played with anger,” Howard said, smiling at the thought of Roberson, whom he met in second grade. “And that’s why I try to play like him, because off the field, I’m far from that.”

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