SALT LAKE CITY — Felicity Huffman sat in the courtroom in a calf-length black dress. Her husband, William H. Macy, sat in the front row. Months of anticipation brought them to this point, a judge bringing down a sentence on Huffman in the college admissions scandal.
Two weeks in prison. A $30,000 fine. One year of supervised release. And 250 hours of community service.
“I accept the court’s decision today without reservation. I have always been prepared to accept whatever punishment Judge (Indira) Talwani imposed. I broke the law. I have admitted that and I pleaded guilty to this crime. There are no excuses or justifications for my actions. Period,” the actress said.
Huffman was the first parent to be sentenced of the 34 parents accused. Six more followed in the multi-state bribery and conspiracy scandal that 51 people were ensnared in because of efforts to get the children of wealthy families into elite universities. Former “When Calls the Heart” star Lori Loughlin and her husband Mossimo Giannulli pleaded not guilty and are awaiting their day in court
Is this simply the latest symptom of a “whatever it takes” culture? Is it a case of the rich buying their way to success at the expense of everyone else? Huffman, at least, seemed to acknowledge the cost to others by her actions, saying during sentencing: “And I especially want to apologize to the students who work hard every day to get into college, and to their parents who make tremendous sacrifices supporting their children.”
Have we learned something new about boundaries, laws and the limits to which parents will go for their children?
Whatever it takes
A new report signals that everyday parents are still willing to do whatever they can do to help their children get into college. But there are limits. The report, from Student Loan Hero and Lending Tree, found that 90% of moms and dads would do whatever it takes to help their children get into the school of their choice — “as long as it didn’t break the law or sacrifice their ethics.” Only 9% of parents said they wouldn’t do “whatever it takes” to get their child into a desired school, though.
The report found 54% of parents with children under 18 would be willing to donate to their child’s top school choice if it would help.
“Part of what what seems to have driven some of the cheating here is some of these families never talked about, they never had real conversations about college.” — Allen Koh, CEO of Cardinal Education
“It speaks to the weight that parents put in their child’s college choice. According to our respondents, they’re willing to do whatever it takes because they link choosing the right school with increasing their child’s future salary,” said Andrew Pentis, lead researcher and author of report. “Of course, they want their kids to be financially fit in the future.”
He added: “Many parents also believed that their involvement would help their child gain admittance to better schools — and that their efforts would make up for any lack of input from the part of the child’s high school.”
Money plays a factor in this. A majority of moms and dads would spend money to help their child get into their desired school. Close to 1-in-4 parents would spend at least $10,000 to help their child get into a school.
Parents are concerned about the college choices of their children. The report found 40% of parents are stressed about getting their child into “a good college.” Dads, it turns out, are more worried, with 47% feeling stressed compared to 34% of moms feeling the same.
“Based on our data, it’s certainly likely that a teenager is facing more pressure at home from their dad — not mom — when it comes to the college application process,” Pentis said.
Part of the stress may come from parents trying to relive their own dreams through their child’s eyes, according to Shima Baradaran Baughman, law professor at the University of Utah.
“Parents will often go too far to make sure their child gets what the parent has always dreamed of, which isn’t necessarily what the child wants,” she said.
So, yes, parents are actively involved in trying to get their children into college. Sometimes it’s for money reasons. Sometimes it’s for their own glory. And, yes, sometime it is actually what the child wants.
But that doesn’t mean parents have to break the law to make it happen.
“Parents and their children can learn that there are plenty of ways to break into consideration for their dream school without breaking the law. Both parents and children might also reconsider the importance of their dream school altogether,” Pentis said.
Picking a dream school remains at the crux of the college admissions scandal, Pentis said. Parents became so interested in where their child wanted to attend college that they were willing to break the law.
“The scandal makes it all about where you want to go to college. People forget college is just part of life journey.” — Allen Koh, CEO of Cardinal Education
Everyday parents may see the scandal as a warning that the dream school isn’t always the best school for you to attempt to get into.
“Parents and children might see this scandal as a reminder that no one school is worth tearing your hair out for. In the opinion of many, it’s more often that the student — not the school — drives their fate in life. Once students get into their career, they might find it less and less important where they graduated from,” he said. “When was the last time you were asked where you attended school?”
Allen Koh, CEO of Cardinal Education, an educational consultancy in the San Francisco Bay Area, agreed.
Koh said his company has worked with some of the families named in the college admissions scandal — he never mentioned which families — and the entire scandal has a lesson for everyone going to college.
“Part of what what seems to have driven some of the cheating here is some of these families never talked about, they never had real conversations about college. And then when they finally have them really late, then they panic, because they realized they were shocked and unhappy with the options,” he said.
The families named in the scandal never considered realistic options for their children, he said. They never received proper college counseling to know where they should have applied.
“You should always know where you stand, right? It’s almost like, if you’re on a team, you want to know like, ‘Am I going to start?’ Or, ‘am I going to be on the bench?’ Right? In any sort of job. Do you want to know what your boss thinks?” he said.
Questions to ask
“Even before you can get to the mechanics of getting into college, you really need to step back and talk about why are we doing these things? What are your values? Do you have values? Like a lot of kids these days they don’t really know what they stand for,” Koh said.
He added: “Who are you as a person? What do you contribute to society? What brings you joy? How do you bring other people happiness? ... These are the most important things, and we want to make sure we’re framing everything in terms of values.”
Koh said people forget that the lessons of the college admissions scandal can apply to your life, too.
“The scandal makes it all about where you want to go to college. People forget college is just part of life journey,” he said. “And yes, where you go to college, it can give you some advantages. But going to another college isn’t going to give you just advantages. We do believe that solid character is what it takes to be successful and happy.”
What’s next
So have we learned anything that will make a difference?
“I think the public shaming and embarrassment that Loughlin and Huffman have both undergone will teach parents that it is not a good idea to cheat in order to get your kids into college,” Baughman said.
Koh said he knows several parents who are scared to donate to their alma mater now out of fear that they could get wrapped into the wrong scheme.
“I think people are actually showing an overabundance of caution on going away from this,” he said. But once that settles there are a few things to keep in mind.
“When it comes to college admissions, I think a healthy exercise is number one, assuming your child will be successful in life, first,” he said. “Number two, then think of reasons why your kid might not be successful. And then positively work on those things, and openly talk about them. Those are the things that you want to work on. Because it’s where you go to college is not ultimately what’s going to stop you in your dreams.”