“In the fall of 2019, I felt very unheimlich.
“That’s a German word that’s hard to translate precisely. It means the gut feeling of uneasiness you get when things just ... aren’t right at home. Like if you walk into your childhood house after being away at college and sense that something is very wrong. Maybe it smells off, or your parents are acting weird, like they have bad news to tell you. A feeling of dread is triggered, but you can’t quite put your finger on what exactly is up. You just feel, well, unheimlich."
With that anecdote, which begins his forthcoming book, behavioral scientist Arthur C. Brooks uses his own experience to illustrate a universal problem: You can be at the top of your professional game and still have the nagging feeling that something is wrong, that something is missing.
In 2019, Brooks was just stepping down after a decade as president of the American Enterprise Institute, one of the most widely respected think tanks in Washington, D.C. His resume was already interesting and diverse: He’d been a professional musician and a university professor, had earned a Ph.D. and written numerous books. He was happily married with three children.
He was hoping that after returning to academic life — he’d accepted a job at Harvard University — things would be better. Instead, he found that the campus was very unheimlich too, full of students struggling with their mental health. It went beyond the campus — almost everywhere he looked, people seemed unsettled, suffering without a physical cause. It is, Brooks writes in “The Meaning of Your Life,” what social scientists call a psychogenic epidemic, and he says it is “real and unprecedented” in our culture.
Brooks believes it’s because there is a crisis of meaning — people lack meaning in their lives, and they’re unsure of how to find it, or what it really is. Despite his professional and personal success, and a deep religious faith, Brooks admits that he’s struggled with meaning himself.
“The Meaning of Your Life” comes out March 31, but Brooks is gearing up for the release with a virtual event March 27 that will feature a number of celebrities, including Rainn Wilson and Maria Shriver. (People who preorder the book will get access to a VIP room and a question-and-answer session with Brooks and his guests.)
Earlier this week, Brooks answered questions posed by the Deseret News and talked about the problem of meaning, how he discovered his calling in his 50s and what gives him hope.
Deseret News: You offer an equation in the book: Happiness equals enjoyment plus satisfaction plus meaning. But a lot of people are missing the “meaning” component, and you have described this as a crisis. Why do you believe this widespread lack of meaning rises to that description?
Arthur Brooks: There are four big bellwethers to unhappiness: anxiety, depression, loneliness and polarization. But the point is that these bellwethers, terrible as they are, are only symptoms of an underlying cause: a cultural malaise of meaninglessness. Meaning is what gives people a sense of purpose, coherence and significance — and its erosion makes people much more miserable across lots of life’s domains. That’s why this is a true crisis.
DN: Does this crisis have anything to do with the decline of organized religion? What other factors in our culture are contributing to it?
AB: It definitely plays a role in the problem. Organized religion gives people a way to step outside of themselves, to serve others and connect not only with a community but with the beauty of the transcendent. People are hungry for that transcendence and belonging, and when organized religion declines, people miss out on routes to both.
DN: What role has your own faith played in the evolution of your thoughts on purpose?
AB: I am a traditional practicing Roman Catholic, and I go to Mass every day. My faith is the single most important source of meaning in my life. It delivers me consolation in times of trouble, helps me make sense of things, and is a route for me to connect with other people. To find meaning in one’s life, I strongly recommend a faith or philosophical tradition — not mine necessarily, but one that helps you to transcend yourself.
DN: In your conversations with people who are struggling to find meaning in their lives, is there any one anecdote that stands out, that seems emblematic of the problem?
AB: In my five years of research for this book, I did a lot of listening to folks struggling with meaning, and even wrote about these stories in the book. One that stood out to me in particular was Marc, a bright young man who felt empty despite his success.
Everyone — regardless of age, sex or relationship status — has a calling to love, to reach toward transcendence and let meaning unfold.
— Arthur C. Brooks
He has a great job, but like many many young strivers, he craves the sense of purpose and significance that comes from being needed by someone. His story highlighted what many are left wondering today: “Is this it? Will I die alone? Will I ever find what I’m looking for?”
I wrote this book to help people like Marc — to let them know your life does have meaning, and you can find it.
DN: Is the path to finding meaning the same for married people and single people? What about men versus women? Young versus old?
AB: Whether married or single, love is our shortcut to the divine. Connecting with something greater than ourselves is what anchors us to meaning. Everyone — regardless of age, sex or relationship status — has a calling to love, to reach toward transcendence and let meaning unfold. Of course, these paths might look different for different people, but my advice — no matter where you’re at in life— is to go love more.
DN: Is your new book in any way a sequel to “Build the Life You Want?” How are the books connected, and how are they different?
AB: I wrote “Build the Life You Want” with Oprah (Winfrey) to help people discover the so-called “macronutrients” of happiness (enjoyment, satisfaction and meaning), manage their emotions, and begin to think about what truly matters in their lives. “The Meaning of Your Life” goes much deeper into the third macronutrient of happiness, meaning. It guides readers to go back to ordinary life — away from doom scrolling and distraction, and into a life full of love, beauty, transcendence, seeking and even suffering.
I think this book is an incredibly important part of my research, and is going to help a lot of young people search and find their meaning.
There are six things we can do to fix the crisis of meaning, all of which used to be normal. Ask and ponder big questions. Cultivate our love relationships. Seek out beauty. Look for our professional calling. Transcend ourselves by practicing religion or philosophy. Don’t waste — and certainly don’t try to eliminate — our suffering. This book is a plan to do just that.
DN: You followed an unconventional path to professional success. What can young men, many of whom are struggling today, learn from your example? What, of the things you have done on your personal and professional journey, would you advise them NOT to do?
AB: I’ve made my career by pursuing my evolving interests, but also by paying special attention to my calling: what I’m meant to do. In my 50s, I found that answer — to lift people up in bonds of happiness and love, using science and ideas.
The big thing to know, though, was that in my 20s, I had no thoughts toward that mission. I was a French hornist in those days. My advice to young men is to always follow what’s most interesting to you — but also to not be beholden to worldly success. During my days as a musician, my greatest ambition was to literally become the world’s greatest French hornist. Tying my self-worth so closely to my professional success took a toll. So, whenever possible, focus on becoming excellent in the things that interest you — notwithstanding the world’s measures of success.
When I speak to ordinary people — in my church, in my community and on the road — I realize that huge majorities of Americans love each other. And not just the people with whom they agree.
— Arthur C. Brooks
DN: You came to Utah and discussed loving your enemies. You suggested: “We need to stand up to the people with whom we agree. You want to fix America? Let’s stop standing up to the people with whom we disagree, which is a waste of time, and start standing up to the people with whom we agree on behalf of those with whom we disagree, who are Americans just like us. That’s how we love our enemies.”
Are you seeing any progress on this front, here in the country or the world?
AB: It depends on where you look. If you’re only watching national politicians, the activist class, or lightning-rod podcasters or influencers, the answer is no — you don’t see any progress. Thankfully, though, those groups make up a vanishing small percentage of the American population. When I speak to ordinary people — in my church, in my community and on the road — I realize that huge majorities of Americans love each other. And not just the people with whom they agree. Real experiences in real life gives me a lot of hope.
DN: You’ve been called “The Professor of Happiness.” Do you yourself ever get discouraged or unhappy? What do you do when that happens?
AB: I got into this work honestly, specifically because I’m not a naturally happy person. I wrestle with strong negative emotions all the time (just ask my wife!). That’s why I started studying happiness decades ago — I call it “me-search.” When I feel low, I have lots of micro and macro habits: walking twice daily, working out in the morning, spending time with my family, focusing on how my work can help others, and nurturing my faith. And the list goes on.