ˇFor the Herds of Grandmas and Dogs Dying

By Natalie Padilla Young

It feels good, doesn’t it? Just throwing something

away, not worrying about how

to recycle or finding the perfect spot.

And isn’t a room much louder once emptied? Bare

shelves — no towels, no blankets, no books

to absorb the echoes.

Then, with all the rooms boxed up, it’s time to move on

to the next house ready to be quieted.

*

Look. There’s a dead bird.

Oh — it’s an owl.

Is it? It’s all scrunched up.

To him (who made me look) it’s just a bundle

of feathers.

To me it’s a head with a beak.

He sees no owl. I see no body.

*

Becoming an erosion —

a canyon or an amphitheater —

the difference is in the method:

A canyon formed from a steady source of flowing

water, a river.

An amphitheater carved with rain and wind,

earth’s movement.

Experts on grief say

one must grieve each sorrow individually. Or else

the griefs mesh

grinding away larger and larger spaces of sadness.

*

Aren’t we always looking

for a holiday miracle? A gluten-free pound cake,

a comforter, a summoning

spell — the cure for all this

subtraction — a wish granted. Blow out the candle

and wham-o:

Negotiation complete. The grandmas are back, the owl

and my dog.

Raise our eyes to the sky, so solid blue

it may as well be white. Give thanks

to whatever we can,

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because we can. Race down the sidewalk. We’ll never stop

running, the herd of us, again.

Natalie Padilla Young is the author of “All of This Was Once Under Water” from Quarter Press (2023), and the editor-in-chief of Sugar House Review in Salt Lake City.

This story appears in the July/August 2025 issue of DeseretMagazine. Learn more about how to subscribe.

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