When my husband and I were married in December of 1987, Elder Russell M. Nelson, then a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, performed our sealing in the Salt Lake Temple. He invited us to come to his office and meet with him a few days before the wedding where he gave us two very specific pieces of counsel.
The first was to pray together daily, counsel that made perfect sense to me.
The second was to always pay our tithing.
He went on to note that I had a special responsibility in that regard, because a loving husband could easily be swayed by the sentiments of his wife on matters of household spending.
We have been full tithe payers for the entirety of our marriage; but for many, many years, I wondered why President Nelson’s second piece of counsel concerned tithing rather than one of the many other things he could have admonished us to do — worship in the temple regularly, keep the Sabbath day holy, willingly accept callings to serve in the church, forgive one another.
It was not until October 2023, when President Nelson related the following account in general conference, that I finally understood the answer to my question of, why tithing?:
“When I was a young intern, my income was $15 a month. One night, my wife Dantzel asked if I was paying tithing on that meager stipend. I was not. I quickly repented and began paying the additional $1.50 in monthly tithing.
“Was the church any different because we increased our tithing? Of course not. However, becoming a full-tithe payer changed me. That is when I learned that paying tithing is all about faith, not money. As I became a full-tithe payer, the windows of heaven began to open for me. I attribute several subsequent professional opportunities to our faithful payment of tithes. Paying tithing requires faith, and it also builds faith in God and his Beloved Son.”
Looking back now as President Nelson celebrates is 101st birthday on Sept. 9, it is clear the decision to repent and become a full-tithe payer was a pivotal moment in his spiritual growth and development. The long-term consequences of that choice were so impactful that he counseled a young couple to prioritize the payment of tithes in their marriage so that they, too, could experience the tremendous blessings that flow from exercising faith and being obedient.
In the summer of 2019, I was again invited to meet with President Nelson in his office. He asked me to join the board of the Deseret Management Corporation, the global operating company managing the for-profit communications related entities affiliated with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
I correctly anticipated that through this experience, I would learn much about leadership from President Nelson, who chairs the board, and from the other board members, all general authorities and general officers of the church.
Observing President Nelson in this capacity has cemented my testimony of the important role that prophetic guidance and counsel play in the operation of the church.
What I did not anticipate is what I would learn about the love that President Nelson feels for me, and for all of God’s children, as his prophet.
At the end of each board meeting, President Nelson goes around the room to personally connect with each board member and DMC leader present.
Although the others in the room refer to me as Dean Madrian, my job title, or Doctor Madrian, my academic title, or Sister Madrian, my church title, President Nelson always calls me by my given name. He holds both my hands, looks me straight in the eyes, and says, “Hello, Brigitte.”
I am the complete focus of his attention. He asks how I am doing and inquires about my family. But more important than what he says is what I feel — his love for me, and through him, God’s love for me.
It is a different and more powerful love than any other I have felt. I wish everyone could have the experience of looking into a prophet’s eyes and feeling that tremendous love. To me, it is a witness that Russell M. Nelson is indeed a prophet of God.
In the October 2023 general conference talk cited earlier, President Nelson asked: “Was the church any different because we increased our tithing? Of course not.”
Were the finances of the church any different because a young medical intern decided to pay $1.50 in tithing every month? No. But is the church any different? It most surely is. Because of that choice, we have at our helm Russell M. Nelson, God’s living prophet on the earth today.
Thank you, President Nelson, for a consecrated lifetime of love and service to others.
