A Ranker poll has BYU a respectable No. 38 on its list of 100 sexiest colleges in America.
Because nothing says sexy like missionaries and married people with kids.
MOO SCHOOL
Utah was No. 52 in the Ranker poll, but Utah State didn’t make the list.
It’s never easy to win these things when people keep calling you “the agricultural college.”
PASSWORD: UTAH
Hoping to boost attendance at football games this fall, BYU made ROC fan club tickets available to Utah Valley University students on Monday.
The only requirement for admission was that visitors recite Max Hall’s “I hate Utah rant” verbatim.
MID MESS
The first four names on Yardbarker’s list of college football’s worst teams are all from the Mid-American Conference.
Which is one more reason why BYU wants nothing to do with anything related to the word “Mid.”
OLD SCHOOL
The world short track speed skating champion has been banned a year for pantsing a teammate.
Lim Hyo-Jun pulled the prank on a younger skater in front of other South Korean athletes, violating sexual harassment rules.
So now you know. No matter how high you go in sports, you’re never far from your junior high gym class.
THEY DIDN’T SOAR
Cops in South Carolina mistook bird excrement on a car for cocaine and charged Georgia Southern quarterback Shai Werts with drug possession. Charges were quickly dropped.
After which the cops allegedly felt, yes, lower than bird doo-doo.
CARRY THAT WEIGHT
Louisiana State defensive end Jarell Cherry says he bulked up in the offseason by carrying bricks in his backpack.
FYI, he really does hit like a ton of bricks.
KING DETHRONED
NFL insider Peter King got pulled over by a cop while talking on his cell phone to “The Dan Patrick Show.”
"Of course I got a ticket," King told Sports Illustrated. "I mean, I said to the cop 'I’m on with Dan Patrick.' And he said ‘Here’s your ticket.'”
So maybe the cop was a Colin Cowherd fan.
THEY’RE ROLLING
A Puerto Rican doubles bowling team has been stripped of its gold medal at the Pan Am Games for a doping violation.
How that would help pick up a 7-10 split is anyone’s guess.
LIVE WEAK
Lance Armstrong trolled Mike Pence on Twitter, saying he “just blew the doors off” the Vice President while passing him on a bike path in Massachusetts.
Armstrong now plans to enter the Cub Scout Olympics to see if he can sweep the sit-up and softball toss competitions.