Dear Abby: The late Ethel Jacobson, whose light verse appeared in Reader's Digest, Good Housekeeping and other publications, was a sometime guest of ours.
The day after she left after a visit, I mailed several things she had forgotten to take with her. Shortly after, she sent me the following poem. I don't think it was ever published. I think it should be.- Dorothea Jensen Bellisime,
Channel Islands, Calif.
Dear Dorothea: So do I, and I'm taking care of it right now. Thanks for sending it. Suggested title:
"LEFTOVERS"
Perennial pest
To haunt our nest
Is the featherbrained
Forgetful guest
Who comes for the day
Or a three-month stay
And leaves behind
When she flits away
A scarf, a veil
Her keys, her kale
Which you must hunt
And wrap and mail.
Her shoes, her comb
Her bubble foam
By post, prepaid,
Must trail her home.
Such folks, in fairness,
Should be branded
Or travel naked
And empty-handed.
Dear Abby: My wife and I have been married six years. Our biggest problem is her two cats. She loves cats and I am not a cat lover. We recently purchased a home for $250,000 and furnished it with new furniture. Both of her cats have long hair and constantly shed everywhere - furniture, floor, counters, etc. They have thrown up and urinated on our new carpeting and furniture, leaving everything permanently stained and discolored. My wife has tried medicine for the hair balls and shedding - nothing works.
I would like to give the cats away, but my wife would not tolerate it. Please help.
- California Reader
Dear Reader: According to Dr. Erwin David, my veterinarian consultant, "The hair-ball problem can be managed with regular grooming and oral laxative products. Inappropriate urination may be a behavioral problem (your cats may be trying to tell you something), or there could be a bladder problem."
If you haven't consulted a veterinarian, I would advise you to do so. If you have, and the problems are continuing, perhaps a second opinion is in order.
Dear Abby: May I put in my two cents' worth about stepmothers? I am one. Last year, my stepdaughter and I overheard a mother loudly reprimanding her son in a busy store.
I commented, "I hope you never make me angry enough to yell at you like that."
She responded, "You can't yell at me - you're not my real mom."
I gently said, "Whew, what a relief . . . that means I don't have to drive you to and from your swimming class, shop for clothes for you, help you with your homework, or buy you anything for Christmas."
The look on her face was priceless.
- Mrs. C.R. in Tustin, Calif.