PROVO — For a bachelor like Thom Carter, turning to Internet dating services for romance is the last resort, an option as appealing as kissing his sister.
"To me, people who date online are big old losers who just can't do it in real life. I know that's the stereotype, but stereotypes come about because they are true," says Carter, a former student body officer at Brigham Young University.
Plenty would disagree with Carter, including many fellow members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
More than 200,000 LDS singles have signed on to the most popular Internet dating site for people of their faith www.ldssingles.com since its inception in 1996.
And this month, a new site www.hotsaints.com has joined the handful of others like it already in existence.
"I think maybe five or six years ago there was more of a stigma about online dating, but it is becoming more and more accepted in the mainstream," says Bob Haupt, founder of ldssingles.com.
Haupt's site receives more than 1 million hits a day and results in some 15 marriage proposals a month, according to site directors. Users span the globe and range in age from 18 to 80.
It delights Haupt the site has become more than a dating service. One user living on an isolated island off the coast of Norway uses it as her outlet to LDS youths. A BYU graduate used the site to rent a place near LDS folks in Nashville, Tenn.
The success of Haupt's site has inspired others to start similar Internet-based services. The latest to do so is Jeff Crane, a Southern California surfer who is the developer of www.hotsaints.com.
The site's catch line is, well, catchy: "Chase and be chaste."
The dating game is especially important in the LDS culture because its members are commanded to marry. Haupt and Crane, both LDS faithful, say their services give members another courting tool.
Jill Maxfield, 20, of Boise, has been using the site for about a year and has already met 50 men in person and received dozens of e-mail messages from others.
"People think online is scary, but how much different is it than meeting someone at the mall?" said Maxfield.
Like many others, Maxfield has experienced the perils of online dating. Several men have tried to make physical advances on the first face-to-face encounter.
Mike Otterson, a spokesman for the LDS Church, said the church is not affiliated with any online "get-acquainted business enterprises."
"The church teaches its youth and young adults to be wise and selective about whom they date and encourages association with others who share high standards of personal conduct and commitment to living gospel teachings," he said.
But the operators of these sites are aware the Internet can become the devil's playground. To that end, designers of ldssingles.com dropped a chat-room feature in favor of instant messaging and also require users to declare how often they go to church and if they attend the LDS temple.
Crane says his site will be safe and won't ask such personal questions. At about $20 a month, it will cost more than ldssingles.com. But, he says, "At the end of the day, what would you rather be? A hot saint or an LDS single?"
E-mail: jhyde@desnews.com