As ridiculous as it sounds, "After the Sunset" almost feels like a retirement announcement from its 51-year-old star — and outgoing James Bond — Pierce Brosnan.
This supposedly cheeky caper film is little more than a greatest-hits collection of scenes — some only thinly veiled reprises — from Brosnan's film and television work, including his 007 movies, TV's "Remington Steele" and even his remake of "The Thomas Crown Affair."
It's also one of the most plot-thin movies in recent memory, with several padded-out or extraneous sequences, which make the film feel much longer than 100 minutes. And Brosnan sounds and looks a little tired. But then, so does the entire film.
The title refers to the retirement of a pair of jewel thieves, Max Burdett (Brosnan) and Lola Cirillo (Salma Hayek). After he is wounded during their final score, she whisks him off to a Caribbean island, and to supposed domestic bliss.
However, he's still got the itch for larceny. This only worsens when his old nemesis, FBI agent Stan Lloyd (Woody Harrelson), arrives and notifies him that a cruise liner is coming with the one prize diamond aboard that Max was never able to get his hands on.
Various go-nowhere subplots involve Stan's unlikely romance with a local constable (Naomie Harris) and a local crime kingpin (Don Cheadle) who wants Max to steal the diamond to reinvigorate the local economy.
Among the harder-to-swallow elements we're supposed to believe is that Brosnan's character could possibly get bored living in paradise with Hayek. She's the one thing the film really has going for it.
Of course, director Brett Ratner is only too willing to exploit Hayek's charms, with gratuitous camera angles designed to show off her physique in several revealing outfits. And that's about his only inventive directorial touch in this clunker.
Brosnan doesn't really do much here, aside from his characteristic wink-and-a-smile routine. Not that you can blame him, since, in many scenes, he's paired with Harrelson, whose broad performance is truly irksome.
"After the Sunset" is rated PG-13 for violence (shootings, a stabbing and some vehicular violence), crude sexual humor and references (including innuendo), occasional use of strong profanity (including one usage of the so-called "R-rated" curse word), simulated sex and other sexual contact, brief partial female nudity, and some brief drug content (use of tranquilizer gas). Running time: 100 minutes.
E-MAIL: jeff@desnews.com