On Sept. 1 Kerby Smith stood on the sidelines, his red helmet on, his No. 44 jersey still a pristine white. With each defensive series he buckled his chinstrap and unbuckled it again; he tightened his shoulder pads and then loosened them again.
This routine continued into the second half, as his cheering gave way to frustration. Kerby was tired of watching. He had been off the field for too long already — he wanted to get out there and hit somebody.
Watching from the stands, his parents, John and Jana, could see his frustration. They knew what he had gone through to be able to put the pads back on, and how important playing in this game was to him.
With 10 minutes left in the third quarter it happened.
Grand County High head coach Dennis Wells was talking to one of his assistants at the time. Wells said he heard the fans screaming and he turned in time to see the Red Devils' defensive coordinator send Kerby in to play right middle linebacker.
As he jogged out to the huddle, Kerby felt the noise from the stands hit him like a would-be blocker.
Wells was blindsided by emotion. Until now he didn't know if he would ever see Kerby on a football field again. Emotion overcame the Red Devil players and the small crowd that had traveled from Moab to Spanish Fork. Team captain Cooper Henderson, a senior offensive and defensive lineman, said, "There really aren't words to describe it ... you felt the emotion running through everyone. You knew something big was going to happen."
Something big had already happened. After almost a year, Kerby was finally back on the field.
On Oct. 14, 2005, he was diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia — the most common form of leukemia, which the National Cancer Institute says occurs in about one of every 29,000 U.S. children each year.
As Kerby's mother, Jana, recalls it, her son got a small cut on his right elbow during the first game of his junior year. He cleaned it and continued to play. Three weeks later, he woke up to a painfully swollen elbow that looked infected. At the emergency room in Moab, doctors found a staph infection.
Three days of IV treatments cleared up the infection, but Kerby's white blood cell count remained low. Even though the infection was gone, he got weaker. Four weeks later Moab doctor Ken Williams saw something that suggested Kerby may have leukemia.
On Oct.13, when he should have been playing in the Red Devils' last region game, Kerby sat out. His teammates were told the news and vowed to win the 2A state title for Kerby. Grand won its game and the region championship. The next day Kerby went to Primary Children's Medical Center in Salt Lake City for a bone marrow biopsy.
"The oncologist that examined Kerby was pretty much convinced that he did not have leukemia," Jana remembers. "He looked healthy, and he suspected that the wacky blood tests had something to do with the staph infection. He was even skeptical to put Kerby through a bone marrow biopsy, but because Dr. Williams was so insistent, he performed the biopsy and was shocked to give us the news." Only weeks later, with his jersey on, Kerby watched from the sidelines, sometimes sitting in a wheelchair. With 44 on their minds and helmets, his teammates won their first two playoff games. Kerby says he wouldn't have missed the games for anything.
Kerby rode the team bus to the 2A state championship game. At the game, Grand County fans sported red and white hats with 44 stitched on the front. Amid this sea of support, Kerby watched his teammates fulfill their vow and win the school's first-ever football state title for him.
Over the next eight months Kerby endured treatments — sometimes three or four times a week. The treatments left him weak, and Kerby was not able to return to school for his junior year. In June doctors cut the treatments to once a month, and Kerby started to rebuild his strength.
Although the treatments will continue through 2009, Jana says the doctors gave the OK to do anything he thinks he's capable of — no restrictions. For Kerby, that meant no restrictions to be a football player and do what he loves.
"Football is a haven for me," Kerby said.
It's his favorite sport and one he excelled in. Until he got sick, Kerby thought he had a chance to play college football at some level, but his dream was "swept away" by his illness. The worst part for Kerby is he had no control over the situation.
He also missed football because of his friendships and bonds with teammates. It was hard for him to stay home while his friends went to practice. Kerby was also motivated by his doubters. "Some of the doctors told me I might not be able to play again," he said. "I wanted to prove them wrong."
Some had concerns about him playing so soon, but you won't hear any concerns or second thoughts from Kerby.
"Not one. I missed it too much last year," he says. "I've learned not to live in fear. I'd rather go out playing. A quote that I read that means a lot to me now is 'If you ain't livin' on the edge, you're taking up too much room."
For Kerby it would have been devastating to not play this year. Last year he knew he couldn't play, but this year he knew he can go out there at any time.
Henderson said he and his teammates knew Kerby was back when one day in practice he "absolutely drilled a kid."
No. 44's return was just the beginning of the story.
As the season wore on, Kerby continued to gain strength. By the end of the season he was playing most of the game on defense and working in with the goal-line offense.
Although he wasn't able to get back to play in the state championship game, Kerby played in the remaining seven regular season games and the Red Devils' two playoff games. His performance on the field and in the classroom earned him Academic All-State honors.
"He's an amazing leader," Henderson said. "A lot of games we were trailing and just to look in his eyes you could see the fire in his eyes ... the passion he was playing with and how much it meant to him.
"Talk is cheap after the opening kickoff," Henderson added. "The ultimate leadership on defense is going out and hitting someone right in the mouth. And he's the general out there."
On that Friday night in September, after a long, hard road back, it only took that short jog out to the huddle to return Kerby to his role as the on-field general.
"The first play my heart was beating so loud that I could barely hear myself call the play," Kerby said.
Henderson remembers that first play — Kerby was blitzing. "The whole time before the play he was yelling, 'Get mean Coop! Get mean!"' Henderson recalled.
Kerby didn't get the sack, but Wells said he had two or three tackles in the game, which the Red Devils won 57-7 at American Leadership Academy.
"I had one that wasn't a good tackle by any means, but I stopped a guy on the one-yard line and stopped the quarterback from scoring a touchdown," Kerby said. "I knew I was getting beaten physically, but it made me feel like I was helping the team."
After all he's been through Kerby was going to savor every moment. "Once they let me in I didn't want to come out," he said.
The morning after the first game, Jana asked Kerby how he felt. He was sore, but "it was a really good sore."
"I love being sore," he said. "Pain isn't that big of a deal anymore."