“Godzilla vs. Kong” is exactly what you think it is.
The film — which debuted in foreign movie theaters and will soon hit movie theaters in the U.S. — tells the story of, well, King Kong versus Godzilla. Two massive, titanic beasts battling it out for supremacy. The two monsters apparently have an ancient rivalry that dates back thousands of years, and now they’re set to face off again.
“Godzilla vs. Kong” is the fourth film in a monster's cinematic universe, which includes “Godzilla” (2014), “Godzilla: King of Monsters” (2019) and “Kong: Skull Island” (2017). All of the events from those films come together for this final film, bringing all the characters together in a crossover event.
But this is no “Avengers: Endgame.” It’s really more of a sequel to “Skull Island” in that it focuses on King Kong.
And despite its attempts to be more than a monster movie, it is, at its core, a PG-13 monster film that is perfect for a summer blockbuster, but little else.
A scene from “Godzilla vs. Kong.”
Warner Bros. Entertainment via AP
I watched “Godzilla vs. Kong” over the weekend on my laptop — it definitely deserves a movie theater viewing if you feel comfortable doing that — and had so many thoughts about what the movie truly is. And, in summation, it’s exactly what you think it is.
‘Godzilla vs. Kong’ is a King Kong movie
Don’t believe the title. It’s not “Godzilla vs. Kong.” It’s “Kong fights the villain Godzilla.” The film’s trailers looked to make Godzilla a villain, and that’s exactly what happens in the film. Kong — who has, historically, always had a heart — is a sympathetic character, who ends up destroying hundreds of buildings, creating millions of dollars in damage and killing scores of people. But we’re supposed to empathize with him for some reason.
And it actually works. You care more about Kong’s story than you do any of the other milquetoast characters. Millie Bobby Brown (“Stranger Things”) only has a moment or two where her charisma pops on screen. Otherwise, she’s as bland as the rest of them.
The only character who provides any jolt of energy is Bernie (Brian Tyree Henry), the comedic side character who leads the band of the heroes down a conspiracy theory hole.
Otherwise, this is a King Kong monster movie. Sorry, Godzilla fans. You’re not getting another film around the monster. Though he shows heroics later in the film — and it’s revealed he may not have been the true villain all long — it doesn’t matter. This film is about King Kong and there’s little else to take away from it.
‘Godzilla vs. Kong’ is a monster movie — even though it tries not to be
“Godzilla vs. Kong” tries to be more than a monster movie. King Kong, in a way, is portrayed like Batman, Superman or Captain America — a hero with extraordinary abilities with a dark past who is reluctant to fight. But soon he learns to accept his new role as a protector of Earth.
Like a superhero movie, it has a crazy amount of damage from two — and sometimes three — strong characters battling each other in cities. We see so much damage without any consequences or indication of how it will all be cleaned up.
Millie Bobby Brown, center, Julian Dennison, left, and Brian Tyree Henry in a scene from “Godzilla vs. Kong.”
Warner Bros. Entertainment via AP
But this isn’t “Avengers.” It’s literally a monster movie for the 21st century with shouting creatures, pounding chests and gruff animals fighting it out. The film even has the cliche diner scene, where Bernie, the conspiracy theory podcaster, rattles off what we know about the monsters. Think of any scenes from the major monster movies — or similar films like “2021” or “The Day After Tomorrow” — and you’ll likely see them here.
Is ‘Godzilla vs. Kong’ a family-friendly monster movie?
I’m going to lean “no” here. For one, there are a few gruesome depictions of violence between the totally fake monsters. There’s one point where King Kong rips off the head of a giant bird and then sips the monster’s green blood. Ew. There’s another moment where Kong rips off the head of Mecha-Godzilla, too. Sure, this may be how King Kong defeats an enemy. But it’s a pretty stark moment that makes you cringe. We get it. You destroyed another beast. Let’s not show off.
The “s-word” is used a ton in this film as a joke. It’s not always effective. There’s a moment where three characters all say it in a road for comedic effect. Some mature language is expected in a film like this. But swearing just to make a joke is a weird way to do it.
That said, the film is a great watch if you’re sick from your second dose of the COVID-19 vaccine. I was absolutely laid out on the couch, recovering from some fatigue. So it made for an enjoyable enough experience to make it through my brief sickness. If you need something to pass the time — or if you just want to watch some fake monsters tear it up and destroy the world — then this is a film for you. But if you’re looking for anything else, it might be worth a skip for now.