I want BYU to be a safe, loving, spiritually supportive place where all members of the BYU community — including those who identify as LGBTQ — can make some of the most profound, difficult decisions of their spiritual lives.
The population we serve at BYU includes, as a majority, young adults who are in a period of astounding personal evolution. Young adulthood is a time of significant development — mentally, emotionally, spiritually and often in personal understanding of sexuality, as well. This crucible of growth brings new context and complexity to the covenants our students strive diligently to keep.
The changes and clarifications to the Church Educational System Honor Code have reopened paradoxical and sometimes painful questions for many in the BYU community — particularly those who identify both as faithful members of the church and as LGBTQ.
I cannot speak for the church, for BYU or for the LGBTQ community. But in an effort to participate in a broader dialogue as called for by President M. Russell Ballard, Elder Ronald A. Rasband and others, I offer some thoughts and perspectives that are the result of my personal journey and study. I hope that others will add their experiences and personal insights as we share a larger conversation about how to create a campus community worthy of our Savior and his church.
As I think about my role in the social fabric of the BYU community, which includes being a teacher, mentor and colleague, I have repeatedly been led to ponder the temple and the things we learn there about Eden.
For both Eve and Adam, there was a moment when they had to face a choice: Paradise without progression on the one hand, hardship with hope of exaltation on the other. That was the sacred, holy, paradoxical space in which agency took shape for humankind.
Precedent for heavy paradoxical choices of eternal consequence matters for LGBTQ saints. To sacrifice a part of oneself in the hope of an ultimate procreative exaltation is one of the most difficult requests made by our Father in Heaven of his children. He asks that of LGBTQ saints. The gravity of that choice, the depth of faith required for that commitment and the sacrifice inherent in the decision must all be honored. For some, covenant keeping may be easy. For others, it is unquestionably a voyage into the refiner’s fire.
Mother Eve was granted a safe and welcoming home in Eden from which to contemplate her choice, as was Adam. Our LGBTQ brothers and sisters deserve that gift. In Eden, Eve and Adam knew that they were wholly and deeply loved. Their instinct to hide themselves following their transgression — their shame — was not prompted by God, but rather by Satan.
Like Enos, each one of us deserves a reverent wilderness in which to wrestle before our maker as we each work out our own salvation.
God’s approach, on the other hand, was different: When they were confronted by their maker about the transgression of partaking of the fruit of knowledge, Eve and Adam did not hesitate to share the full truth about themselves with their Father in Heaven. His very presence made them feel safe in their disclosure and vulnerability. This even after, having partaken of the fruit of the tree, their eyes were open to the consequences of their actions.
I want BYU to feel like Eden. By this, I mean that students at BYU should feel safe and loved. And they should be able to share their whole selves, including their sexual orientation, with their BYU community without fear of rejection. They should be held in a spiritually nurturing environment as they face some of the biggest decisions of their lives. Like Enos, each one of us deserves a reverent wilderness in which to wrestle before our maker as we each work out our own salvation.
My family, friends, university and church community created an Eden in which I could face the questions, challenges and mistakes of my tumultuous earlier years. Because of this, I was able to develop a strong faith in my Savior and in his gospel. I want that for others, too. I think there should be no better place than BYU to provide nurturing spiritual guidance through the storms of young adulthood.
Eva Witesman is an associate professor at the Romney Institute of Public Management at Brigham Young University.