Evangelist Jim Bakker said in a letter Monday that his time in federal prison has left him a brokenhearted, lonely man and being behind bars at Christmas was "almost more than I could bear."
Bakker's four-page, handwritten letter to his followers in Charlotte was different from other mass mailings he has done in recent years - it never once asked for money.Instead, Bakker admitted he is a sinner and said God has forgiven his sins. He insisted, however, he is not guilty of the con-artist charges that landed him a 45-year prison term last October.
"I have failed God and made many mistakes in my lifetime," Bakker said, "but I am not guilty of any of the charges the government has made against me. PTL was not bankrupt while Tammy and I were there."
Bakker did not mention the Rev. Jerry Falwell by name, but his letter made it clear he believes the Baptist fundamentalist preacher is the real criminal in the PTL case.
Falwell took over PTL in March 1987 after Bakker resigned in disgrace over a sexual fling with former church secretary Jessica Hahn. Donations dried up, and three months later Falwell took PTL into bankruptcy court.
"Those who conspired to defraud us and the PTL partners put the ministry into bankruptcy, then lobbied the government to launch a grand jury investigation and instigated a class action suit. They had to destroy me to cover and justify their crime."
Falwell, meanwhile, said Sunday night he believes Bakker's 45-year sentence is too harsh.
"No doubt a debt to society had to be paid," said Falwell. "But 45 years is unreasonable. I think everybody here - including the court - just got caught up in the spectacular nature of what was going on.
"Nobody ever accused me of being a fan of Jim Bakker," Falwell added, "but I'm doubtful that (deposed Panamanian strongman Manuel) Noriega, in a U.S. court, will get 45 years for his crimes against humanity."
Bakker said spending Christmas behind bars was the saddest experience of his life.
"As my son (14-year-old Jamie Charles) hugged and said goodbye to me on Christmas day, he started to sob," said Bakker. "Then his sister, Tammy Sue started to cry."