Although the Super Bowl champion New England Patriots open training camp today, their rookies reported Sunday.
Andy Stokes is one of those rookies. A St. George native, Stokes signed a two-year, $557,500 contract with a $17,500 signing bonus after being tabbed with the 255th — and final — pick in April's NFL Draft.
A 6-foot-5, 250-pound tight end (think New York Giants tight end Jeremy Shockey, but with a close-cropped crew cut), Stokes first starred as a prep quarterback in Nevada (he resided with his grandparents during high school) before converting to tight end at Dixie State. He later played at Snow College before transferring to William Penn.
Each June, the California coastal city of Newport Beach opens its arms to welcome the last pick in the NFL draft as its guest of honor in a most unlikely of celebration: Irrelevant Week, an eclectic festivity aptly summed up by its motto: "Doing something nice for someone for no reason."
First held in 1976, Irrelevant Week confers the title of Mr. Irrelevant upon the unwitting player fortunate enough to be the very last selection in that year's NFL draft and then celebrates his irrelevance with parties, gifts, a golf tournament, a banquet and a visit to Disneyland. This year, the party took place June 20-23, and the Deseret Morning News was there to witness Stokes' coronation as Mr. Irrelevant XXX (the Roman numeral, not the adult film rating).
With Cam Quayle (Weber State, 1998) and Tevita Ofahengaue (BYU, 2001) among the former honorees, Stokes' coronation marks the third time in eight years that Mr. Irrelevant has been a tight end with Utah ties.
The Arrival
Stokes arrives in Orange County on Sunday, the day before Irrelevant Week officially begins. Having been sequestered at the Patriots' training facility in Foxboro, Mass., for more than a month, Stokes is, well, stoked at the chance to spend some time with his girlfriend, parents, grandparents and younger sister while in California.
"I haven't seen my family for a long time," said Stokes. "I've been (in Massachusetts) since May 16. It's a good vacation for the whole family."
At an afternoon meet-and-greet barbecue at a beachside condo with Irrelevant Week's board of advisers, Stokes is barraged with handshakes and friendly smiles. The only odd thing about the scene is that seemingly everyone is showing their support of Stokes by wearing either a Patriots shirt or cap, or both.
At 5:30 p.m., Stokes crosses the boardwalk and heads for the water — the first time, in fact, that he's ever been in the ocean in his life. His first act in the official capacity of Mr. Irrelevant XXX is a surfing lesson from a professional surfer.
Like any surfing neophyte, Stokes struggles just to stand up on his board. With his family and assorted well-wishers looking on, he manages to get up a few times, enough at least to tell the folks back home that he learned how to surf.
On a bench back near the boardwalk sits Paul Salata, the Irrelevant Week founder who played receiver at USC and in the NFL during the 1940s who made his money in real estate speculation. Salata soaks in the scene as Stokes surfs. Although Irrelevant Week will last through Thursday, Stokes will leave Tuesday night in order to be back at Foxboro when voluntary workouts resume Wednesday.
Expounding the gospel of Irrelevance, Salata says, "We're short two days on Andy, but if he goes somebody else will step up and we'll honor him that night. Maybe it'll be you."
With his foray into surfing complete, Stokes pads back to the condo wearing only a towel wrapped around his swim trunks. His sculpted physique is surprisingly svelte for a man who weighs 250 pounds.
"It's a good thing I don't play football the way I surf," he quips.
The Departure
Monday's festivities included a press conference and party where Stokes was showered with more than 200 gifts. Among the booty were a Pug dog dressed up in a red cape a la cartoon character Underdog, caps from all 32 NFL teams, a gold watch, golf clubs, and a pearl necklace for Stokes' mother Mitzi.
Now it's Tuesday evening, time for the $100-a-plate fundraising banquet where Stokes will be presented with the Lowsman Trophy. The Lowsman is the anti-Heisman, a trophy awarded annually to Mr. Irrelevant that depicts a football player fumbling the ball.
The dinner, held a pigskin's throw south of John Wayne Airport in the Irvine Marriott ballroom, includes speakers such as agent Leigh Steinberg, former NFL coach Jim Mora and Terry Donahue, fresh off his firing as San Francisco 49ers general manager.
More gifts are given to Stokes this night, including an oversized, $3,000 Rolex watch and a Wheaties cereal box autographed by former NFL MVP Kurt Warner.
Before long, though, the clock strikes 9 p.m. It's time for Stokes to be whisked off to the airport to catch his redeye into Boston, time for him to stop being Mr. Irrelevant XXX and once again resume his role as the fifth tight end on New England's depth chart; time for his carriage to turn back into a pumpkin.
Stokes hugs and re-hugs family members and plants a couple of kisses on his girlfriend. Stokes' parents Tom and Mitzi wipe tears from their eyes, unable to accompany their son to the new experience he's heading off to.
Amid the hugs and embraces, Stokes pauses to reflect on the past 48 hours.
Said Stokes: "They take somebody who is irrelevant, and they treat you really good. They really know how to take care of you."
After all the goodbyes are exchanged, Melanie Fitch, Salata's daughter and Irrelevant Week CEO, escorts Stokes down the hall, out the door, and into the night.
Once their son is no longer within their line of sight, St. George residents Tom and Mitzi Stokes turn to each other for comfort. Tom is holding the oversized Rolex, while Mitzi clutches the Kurt Warner Wheaties box.
Epilogue
As a seventh-round choice, it will be an uphill battle for Stokes to make the final cut. He's currently fifth on a depth chart at tight end featuring two former first-rounders (Ben Watson, Daniel Graham) and a pair of experienced veterans (Christian Fauria, Jed Weaver).
But don't count Stokes out just yet — he presents an intriguing combination of athleticism and size. The Patriots, who have a history of striking gold with late-round picks (including a sixth-rounder by the name of Tom Brady), wouldn't have selected Stokes if they hadn't seen something in him they thought they could use.
E-mail: jaskar@desnews.com