Elder Patrick Kearon shared a personal struggle on Tuesday during BYU’s annual Education Week devotional.
He joked that he can be guilty of the very behavior he cautioned against — excessive focus on goals and a tendency for overachievement that, at worst, can overwhelm the peace offered by Jesus Christ.
“Ironically — you might like this — I have felt that this talk is unfinished,” he said, laughing along with 15,347 people at the Marriott Center in Provo. “And after some angst, I am now at peace with that. Almost anyway.”
Goal-setting blesses lives, the drive to achieve is important in a competitive world and both are characteristic of the culture of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, said Elder Kearon, a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles.
“We need goals, we need plans. They keep us focused on things that really matter. They have a place,” he said. “But is it right that they consume us, and that we apply that kind of focus and pressure to every element of our lives?”
“Achievement for the sake of achieving does not result in lasting peace,” he said. “... Too frequently this push to achieve goes past healthy limits, and we begin to tie our self-worth to our productivity and to our success.”
He mentioned a prestigious study titled “Goals Gone Wild.” Researchers found that when every goal is measured, completing them can spark less joy, Elder Kearon said.
Balance is required between achievements and keeping Christ at the center, Elder Kearon said.
“Our praise for — and delight in — personal accomplishment keeps our eyes focused on us — our efforts, our lessons, our hustle,” he said. “This puts us at the center of the story that our Savior is meant to occupy, and reliance on ourselves and not on him.”
Elder Kearon had a message for those struggling to find peace and suffering under the weight of a perceived need to achieve.
“If I have a wish for you, it is that you will find peace in your actual life,” he said, “not the life you think you would have if you were able to finish your to-do list, have three extra hours in a day, and finally achieve your goals.”
Before he was an apostle, his role as a General Authority Seventy included assignments from the late President M. Russell Ballard, acting president of the Quorum of the Twelve.
The leader saw a need for Elder Kearon to slow down.
One day, after Elder Kearon had reported on a task, President Ballard sent him a message that included nothing but a link to a video of the Norwegian soprano Sissel Kyrkjebø singing “Slow Down” with the Tabernacle Choir and Orchestra at Temple Square.
“My wish,” Elder Kearon said Tuesday, “is that you and I might slow down and turn more easily and comfortingly to Christ, and bask in his promised peace ... Please, please slow down. Be still and wait for the spirit of the Lord. Please slow down and hear his voice and know that he is God.”
That can be difficult for those wired to achieve, he said.
“Ask a room like this one to picture in their minds what ‘loving God with all one’s heart, might, mind and strength’ looks like, and I suspect many of us would see ourselves doing something — serving, building, teaching, organizing, sleeves rolled up. Might and strength are not restful words.”
But rest is vital, he said. It is embedded in the commandments: Keep the Sabbath day holy.
“Do you have a demanding calling that makes Sabbath rest difficult? So do I,” Elder Kearon said, smiling as the Marriott Center filled with laughter — apostles can travel more than 40 weekends a year to minister to Latter-day Saint congregations around the world.
“But I have found it is a matter of definition,” he said. “What do you seek from your Sabbath rest? What constitutes rest for you?”
Elder Kearon said taking the sacrament is part of his rest. He also tries to pray outside in the early morning of a Sunday when possible. He also enjoys a daydream or nap — too often on a plane returning from a weekend’s assignment.
Rest can be very difficult for the achiever.
“Sitting and attending are necessary parts of discipleship, and for many of us, that is harder than the hands-on service,” he said.
God is aware of those who struggle, wondering if their best can ever be good enough.
“Your Good Shepherd is moved with compassion for you,” he said.
“A truth I hope will sink deeply into your soul is that your best is certainly good enough,” he said, “that you are loved more than you can imagine, and that it isn’t your achievements that define you ... .”
Jesus Christ wove peace and quiet contemplation into his own life, and he noted to Martha, who ministered to him with her work during his visit to her home, that there is a necessity to make time to sit and focus on his words.
“We want to be the disciple who does the one thing that is needful: sit and listen to Jesus,” he said.
“There is no ‘try-harder’ button that produces the love of Christ,” he said. “There is no plan, no goal, no target, no course of study, however excellent, that will manufacture it. We do not build it. We receive it, from him, at his hand.”
