BYU President Shane Reese made several announcements and developed several themes during the fall semester-opening campus devotional on Tuesday, but there was a clear emphasis on human connection, dating and marriage.
That message lands a year after the latest data showed 17% of BYU students are married, down from 25% in 2021.
So Reese told students to pop out their earbuds, stuff their cellphones in their backpacks and talk to each other. He shared two stories of leaders who met their future wives by mustering the courage to talk to them in a line at BYU.
It might seem frictionless to keep the earbuds in and to swipe through reels on a phone, but the risk is high in opportunities lost, he said. He defined friction as productive struggle.
“No one has ever told me that swiping on TikTok while waiting in line transformed their life,” Reese said. “So embrace the awkward. Embrace the human. Say something to one of God’s children. Find some friction. Who knows, it might even generate some honor code-appropriate sparks.”
The devotional contained several other newsworthy items:
- President Reese broke the news that next week’s devotional will be delivered by Elder Neil L. Andersen of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, triggering a long, notable buzz in the crowd because BYU hasn’t released its fall devotional schedule.
- He also announced that BYU will place a special emphasis this year on temple worship in preparation for the Salt Lake Temple Celebration and public open house that begins in April.
- Sister Wendy Reese invited students to pray with ears to hear the answers and the faith to follow them.
- The 12,477 students in attendance at the Marriott Center received a BYU pin as the university begins its 151st year. “We hope it inspires you to seek the Savior’s light in your life and share it with those around you,” BYU Vice President Keith Vorkink said.
But President Reese centered his talk on his former stake president’s advice to “embrace the awkward.”
A new semester — for freshmen, a new school — regularly creates awkward moments, but Reese said that is fantastic “because awkwardness, in my experience, is a sign of growth.”
He begged — his word — students to “hear God more and your earbuds less” in the name of personal development and increased interaction and unity in the campus community.
“Nobody masters anything by staying within the safety of what they already know,” Reese said. “There must be productive struggle and frequent failure. So don’t be embarrassed by the stumbles; champion them.
“They are badges of becoming.”
He twice repeated a statement from a recent article that stated, “Friction is where discernment lives. It’s where thinking starts.”
“Having a machine lift weights for you won’t build your muscles,” Reese said. “Having artificial intelligence write and think for you won’t develop your intellect, character or social skills. Taking up your cross so often requires first putting down your phone.”
Even in the dawning age of AI, he said, Jesus Christ is the example.
“We need to find ways to turn from our screens and look to Jesus and live,” he said. “... The Savior would never have seen Zacchaeus up in a tree had he been staring down at a literal scroll. The Savior was so often focused on others. His gaze was upward and outward, not inward and downward.”
He asked students to draw closer to Christ through temple worship.
“He will change you, and he will support you during even your most challenging moments,” Reese said. “Make worship in the house of the Lord a priority even amid the hustle and bustle of a new school year.”
The fourth-year president said each student’s path to growth and service will be unique.
“But I promise, God wants you to become a new creature in Christ here at BYU,” he said. He added, “BYU is designed to aid you along that journey to become the person God wants you to become.”
The Reeses regularly mention dating and marriage, and he shared the story of how they met in a social media post about the devotional.
BYU also has taken steps to increase opportunities for students to meet and date. The annual BYU Date Night on Nov. 7 promises over 30 activities and free food for the first 5,000 to attend.
Sister Reese asked students to turn to God first.
“My invitation to you at the outset of this semester is to have ears to hear,” she said, “to really hear the instructions from heaven that God wants to give to you, and then to have the faith to follow them.”
She said answers to prayer will come in the Lord’s time but assured the students that he hears their prayers and provides what is needed when it is needed.
She suggested four things to do while waiting for an answer to prayer:
- First, wait for answers — but don’t wait. “What I mean by that is don’t wait to move forward with your life. Keep moving and stay patient while being anxiously engaged in good things.”
- Second, immediately write down thoughts that come to your mind. “Thoughts are often fleeting and hard to remember. Write down actions and ideas that come to you, and then do them.”
- Third, remember the many times the Lord has answered your prayers in the past, and make notes about how you felt.
- Finally, take to heart the wisdom of the psalmist who wrote, “Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord.”
She also told students to tune out distractions the way they are able to tune into one conversation in the din of a party, a phenomenon known as the “cocktail party effect.” She jokingly said that at BYU it is the “mocktail party effect.”
“We can and should train our spiritual senses to do the same,” she said. “This semester let us tune out the noise and focus on God. Find quiet time each day where you can turn to your Heavenly Father and pour out your soul to him. And then listen, really listen with ears to hear what heaven wants to tell you.”
The devotional can be watched online at BYUtv.