Dear Abby: My husband and I have been married for nearly 40 years. We are the same age, 68, and we have grandchildren who think "Popsie" hung the moon. He has been very good to me - except for the times he's been involved with other women.
Last year, I saw him kissing our next-door neighbor, who is a widow nearly our age. My husband told me he was just giving her a birthday kiss. (This was October and her birthday is in July.)I suspected there was something between them when he went to her house to borrow something from her late husband's tool chest, and came out zipping up his pants. I had just gotten over forgiving him for getting involved with a 30-year-old woman he met in a shop at the mall when he was shopping for my Christmas gift.
Hell will freeze over before I leave him and everything I have helped him make.
I have never refused him, no matter how tired I am. If there was something I could put in his coffee to settle him down, I'd do it in a minute. He has lots of good qualities, but loyalty isn't one of them. I don't know whether I love him, or he is a 40-year habit. We were childhood sweethearts.
I don't expect you to answer this, but it's done me a lot of good getting all this off my chest. Sign me
. . . Old Faithful
Dear Old Faithful: Don't apologize; that's what I'm here for. As Hamlet said, "sometimes 'tis better to bear those ills we have than to fly to others we know not of."
Dear Abby: I am 16 years old and four months pregnant. My boyfriend and I have gotten along fine until this past week.
I am totally against abortion and I don't think I could live with the thought that someone else was raising my child. My father and I don't talk anymore and he hates the idea that I am his daughter and pregnant.
I talk to a lot of people at school and my friends help a lot, too. I hate not having the support of my father. Is there any advice that you can give me?
- Desperate and Scared in Hamilton, Ohio
Dear Desperate and scared: Your father is disappointed and probably angry that you and your boyfriend did not act more responsibly in preventing the pregnancy. And because many young women cut short their educations to raise these babies as single mothers, it is likely that he feels his dreams for your future have come to nothing. You do need to talk to your father and explain to him that his support is crucial during this difficult time.
Although you and your boyfriend are not getting along right now, he is required by law to contribute to the support of his child. If he has not already discussed this with you and your parents, you and your parents should consider discussing first with his parents - and later possibly with an attorney - how this must be arranged. Good luck.
Dear Abby: Adding to your columns on people who don't return books, someone (Dorothy Parker?) wrote:
"They borrow books they will not buy,
"They have no ethics or religions,
"I wish some kind Burbankian guy
"Would cross my books with homing pigeons."
- Les Lenzner, Poway, Calif.