Everyone knows the old adage that it takes a village to raise a child. Well, the longer I’m a mother, the more I realize that it also takes a village to raise a mother.
As women and mothers, we need each other, every single day. When our babies are young, we need each other for advice. We turn to each other to learn how to get our little ones on a sleep schedule, what to feed them and how best to nurse.
We rely on each other for playdates to keep our sanity when we’re in that terrible stage where our babies can’t do much but we’re going to go nuts if we have to put the shapes in the shape shorter one more time.
As our kids grow, we arrange carpools, freezer meal swaps and outings to lighten our loads. We pass down clothing, suggestions and expert mother diagnoses on what that weird rash might be. We take turns babysitting so we can see our spouses occasionally, and we squeeze in girls’ nights so we can feel like someone other than Mom once in a while.
In so many ways, we help each other through this journey of motherhood. But perhaps the greatest thing we get from this mommy network is the sense that we’re not alone. Motherhood can be a very isolating job. We work in our homes, and our efforts usually go unnoticed because they’re just prat of the everyday flow of life in our families.
So we turn to each other, for support, for affirmation, for a reminder that we’re all just doing the best we can. We’re finding our way together, stumbling, failing and helping each other back up.
In the last two years, the shape of my motherhood has shifted somewhat after news that my first book would be published. This was my dream, and I wasn’t sure how I could make it all work while still being the kind of mother I wanted to be for my children.
Enter my village. My neighbors and friends rallied around me with offers of help. They watched my kids after school. They brought me dinners. They laughed with me, cried with me and were there at a moment’s notice when I needed help.
And last week, when that book officially launched into the world, they showed up to celebrate my achievement. And like mothers do, they showed up early to help set up and stayed late to help clean. One even curled my hair, and some dressed up to look like the cover of my book, “Scars Like Wings.”
As I looked out at their smiling faces, I was reminded again how much we all need each other. As mothers. As humans. I can’t do this journey alone, and thankfully, I don’t have to. No matter what, I have my village of mothers — of women — by my side.
From stretch marks to the latest news for moms, Erin Stewart discusses it all while her three children dive-bomb off the couch behind her. Read more from Erin at www.erinstewartbooks.com.