SARATOGA SPRINGS — Every time Kevin Tenney visits a fast-food drive-thru, he asks the cashier to add the bill for the car behind him to his check. Without asking for the new total, Tenney pays and leaves a card with the hashtag #BrightonADay and is on his way.
This ritual is one way the Tenney family copes with the loss of their 4-year-old daughter, Brighton, who died after contracting respiratory syncytial virus, croup and pneumonia in January.
The tradition has also become a way for them to give back to the community that rallied around them when they were in need.
"I think without having all this Brighton a Day thing, it would feel very alone," Kevin Tenney said.
Just a few months ago, after spending most of their time at Primary Children's Hospital, Kevin and Bethany Tenney, along with their five other children, had to make the trip home without Brighton. But upon driving into their neighborhood, the grieving family was surrounded by pink ribbons hanging on trees and a living room full of teddy bears, one of Brighton's favorite toys. Friends and neighbors brought meals every night for a month. They also made a quilt using Brighton's clothes and came by often to check on the family.
"Literally for the first month, every day there was something new, and people just didn’t stop," Kevin Tenney said.
Although the pain was still raw, the overwhelming support the Tenneys received helped them get through each day.
"It was very good for our other kids," Bethany Tenney said. "They were struggling too, but for them, it gave them something to look forward to."
Strangers also learned of the Tenneys' loss and began to reach out. After one woman started using a hashtag in Brighton's honor, Kevin and Bethany Tenney decided to create one of their own: #BrightonADay. The couple also created a Facebook page to document the service they continued to receive. Cards and wristbands with #BrightonADay were made, and the Tenney family looked for opportunities to hand them out.
"We have a 9-year-old daughter, and her and her friends made these bags with treats they just got out of the pantry and put Brighton a Day cards in them and left them in a bunch of parks in our neighborhood," Bethany Tenney said. "So for her, and for all of our kids and the same for us, when they feel like they are doing something in memory of Brighty, it makes them feel better about what’s going on."
In another effort to thank the community that has supported them, Kevin and Bethany Tenney recently created the Brighton A Day Foundation, a nonprofit organization that will plan events for those who have lost a loved one or are in the midst of a challenge.
"We realized we’re blessed, and it’s a unique situation where somehow her story and her spirit or whatever just really appealed to people," Kevin Tenney said. "We understand that we’re kind of not the norm, and we want to take that platform and try to bless others that are going through equally as hard, if not harder, situations and try to see if we can give them that same experience that we’ve had."
This Friday, the Brighton a Day Foundation will host its first party in honor of what would have been Brighton's fifth birthday on May 19. The event will be held at Shay Park in Saratoga Springs from 5-10:30 p.m. Children are asked to wear princess or superhero costumes, and adults are encouraged to wear pink, Brighton's favorite color. A plaque will be placed at the park in Brighton's honor. The Tenney family will use this event to raise money for the foundation.
"The goal that I have in life is after I pass away that people will remember me for something good," Kevin Tenney said. "With (Brighton), she was 4, and so many people are rallying around this little girl. To me, that is just amazing."
Email: sarahsanders.byu@gmail.com | Twitter: @Sarah_DNews